Lacking Independence Much?

"The tragedy is that so many people look for self-confidence and self-respect everywhere except within themselves, and so they fail in their search." - Dr Nathaniel Branden

I'm no feminist, but I do believe the days of women depending on men for... well anything should be behind us. This is why when I see close girlfriends, that I love and care about, showing signs of being extremely dependent on men (and twenty-something men at that) it drives me insane.
Did I say men? Sorry I meant boys, because those are the only guys these girls are attracting right now.

Fact: Men like a chase.

Yeah, they like a quick lay BUT a quick lay isn't take-home-to-mom material.

Why do women let men break down their self confidence to a point of no return? To the point where all they want is male attention - no matter the form it comes in?

Granted I've been in a relationship for five straight years; but I like to use to supplement my point.

I'm not dependent on my boyfriend. Sure, I enjoy spending time with him BUT I enjoy spending time with others just as much. Sure, you can say I don't know what it's like to be lonely BUT I do; and I know from personal experience that I can fill my own voids with things other than men. Like hobbies or friends or education.

I digress...

Enter personal example(and maybe reason this subject came to mind) - a friend of mine, let's call her June, is well... lost.

June dated a guy for three years; this relationship ended harshly a couple of months ago and she was left feeling worthless. Natural reaction for the immediate time following a breaking up that involves 'another women'. But this state of mind didn't leave, in fact it grew worse.

Instead of grieving then learning to stand on her own two feet again, June threw herself into another relationship with someone just as emotional scarred as she. Attempting to be a supportive friend, I was all for this partnering - in fact, I helped it come about. If June was happy, I was happy.

And June was happy, for a while. But then things took a turn for the worst when the emotionally scarred other half changed his mind and ended it. Now, I personally think he ended it in a very mature and adult way - there was no foul play - it just wasn't working.

Junes first attempt to fill that void? Another man. Compliments from men. Attention from men...
See the pattern here?

Prior to the three year relationship June was extremely independent, but now that part of her is nowhere to be seen. I know it's inside her somewhere but I can't fathom why it's male attention she's seeking instead of just building herself back up again?

As they say - you can love another until you learn to love yourself.

This blog isn't really about June, just her situation and how I see that in so many of my female peers. What is it that drives them to believe they need a male in their lives to be worthy of self worth?

If my relationship were to end tomorrow, I would be devastated because of that loss - but there would be no loss of self worth. That's something I built myself and that no one can take from me.